Friday, November 30, 2007

Neckties vs. Bowties


DAPHNE MATTHEWS: Bowties, they’re beautiful. They look so nice when they’re tied. You can buy them already tied, they have clips and you just clip them on.

JERRY ST. CLAIR: Neither. Nope. Well, when the case comes, I’d rather have a neck, ‘cause then I can tighten it up myself. When I was in the service I had a doctor’s certificate to leave the top button on my shirt open – I’d have the tie on, but that way I could keep it loose. That’s on account of I’ve got an adam’s apple that’s set in so far. (points to his Adam’s apple) Otherwise I’d gag and choke. I was almost discharged for that before I ever went overseas. It’s one of these things where the adam’s apple’s so far into the throat so that even touchin’ it puts tension on it and it gags me. That’s why I hate a tie, period.
PHEBE BROWN: I don’t like anything around my neck, but I don’t think it’s because of my adam’s apple.
JERRY: I wear these string ties –- I got three or four of them and I wear those. I got my senior citizen pin and I hook that up to it, and when we go out on trips I wear that as a necktie.
In the service I think they’ve changed that now so you don’t have to wear a tie anymore with the uniform, unless it’s a ball or some formal event. Used to be so you had to have it tied just so and have the buttons done just right, too. Patton, he was a sonofabitch. I think they’ve changed those tie regulations now, but don’t quote me on that.

ROSE DWYER: Well, I think I prefer neckties. My husband liked bowties and he would wear them quite a bit and he looked very nice because he was quite tall. I think a bowtie looks good on somebody tall, but I don’t think it looks good on a short person. Usually a short person has a short neck, and it looks too –- um –- what am I trying to say? I can’t think of the right word.
DBG: Crowded?
ROSE: Yeah. Somethin’. It makes their neck look too short.

BURDETTE BUCKLEY: Necktie, if I wear one, but that’s not very often. Weddings, funerals and church – once in a while, but not always. (laughs) That’s enough!

JIM PERRY: No way! If I don’t have to wear it, then I’m happy. Havin’ on a necktie is like havin’ on a noose.
FLORENCE PERRY: And if he puts on a tie when we go someplace, when we get there, he takes it off.
JIM: If I have to wear one, I put on one that clips on. Those ones you tie go around your neck just like a noose. Someone said to me, “Why don’t you wear your tie loose?” Now how the hell can you wear a tie loose?!
ALICE RYAN: Why wear a tie then?
JIM: Exactly! That’s what I said to them.
ALICE: But they look so nice.

MARION KINNIN: Oh neckties. I don’t care for bowties. In some cases they’re okay, but as a rule I don’t care for them.

BURDETTE BUCKLEY: How do you tie that, Bob?

HELEN PETTEYS: I think a necktie’s the best thing because if you want to get ahold of a guy, you just grab ahold of the necktie and you’ve really got somethin’ to hold onto then!

(from The Duplex Planet #149, 1998)


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